Saturday, March 03, 2007

Haiku/Gesundheit (Volume XLVI)

on trying aluminum-free deodorant for the first time

if it's natural
why are my armpits in flames?
no more tom's for me


what's more inappropriate: where the toothpaste falls, or where you're staring?

worktime toothbrushing
can cause some unsightly stains
please avert your eyes
on second thought, i'll hold it til i get home

i move from stall to
stall in search of nirvana
as in dante's hell
thoughts concerning the revival of carcass-based raiments

fur coats line the streets
like cars in a traffic jam
i just don't get it

8 comments:

XOXO said...

OH my gosh! I've used some deodorant like that before. I had tears of pain.

thirdworstpoetinthegalaxy said...

A shout-out to Washington, whose quips regarding this newest fur coat phenomenon "inspired" the last haiku.

thirdworstpoetinthegalaxy said...

XOXO - Yeah, I dealt with it four days in a row; first thinking the stinging was razor burn; the second realizing it wasn't; and the third and fourth "just making sure" it was the new "natural" deodorant.

I tried a different brand of aluminum-free stuff last night... it didn't burn at all, but my first thought this morning was a revealing "what's that smell?"

disgruntled world citizen said...

ow. that sounds... uncomfortable, to say the least.

Mollie said...

After reading an article about a "possible" connection between aluminum-powered deodorants and breast cancer, I bought the adidas no aluminum version, which seems to work fine for me. No burning or fire feelings. I was worried because I seem to sweat like crazy when I'm teaching, but I am satisfied with this. Maybe you should try it.

thirdworstpoetinthegalaxy said...

Mollie - Thanks for the tip! For now, I'm going to apply (multiple times a day) the Trader Joe's stuff I bought when the Tom's failed so miserably. I don't suspect the Trader Joe's stuff will last long, though. It requires multiple applications to keep from "stinking up the joint," as the kids say.

Once that's gone, I'll have to try the Adidas.

thirdworstpoetinthegalaxy said...

I forgot to ask: is it easy to find?

thirdworstpoetinthegalaxy said...

And also:

I've heard that about aluminum, too. I've also read studies that link aluminum (the consumption of by way of cooking with aluminum-coated pots and pans) to Alzheimer's.

Whether these studies are well-substantiated or not, I'd like to reduce my risks, if at all possible.